Monday, January 5, 2009

Another nightmare, even worse than the last one

I have a recurring nightmare.

Have you ever really paid attention to the stock footage used in news stories? Take note next time you're watching some 20/20 expose on the rampant obesity present in our country right now, or on the prevalence on high cholesterol in ever-younger patients, or any number of other topics. Invariably, at some point in the montage, you will see a booty zoom.

Do you know what I'm talking about? I would hate to be the poor camera man whose job it is to go to a crowded place and zoom in on the butts (not the faces, mind you) of the fattest people around.

Some of this footage is dated by the booty-licious fashion statements. Some is more broad in its applicability. But all of it is horrifying.

I generally have a good attitude about my body image and how I look in general: I just don't care that much what other people think about me. I like to look cute, but mostly because I don't want to worry about turning to stone every time I look in the mirror.

For some reason, though, I live in mortal fear that one day, I will watch that expose on 20/20. I will see the booty zoom. And I will recognize the butt.

Can you imagine that moment of clarity? Wow, good thing I'm not as fat as those people . . . oh, that looks like someplace I've been before . . . and I have a shirt just like that . . . OMIGOSH! I AM those people! That's my butt on tv!

That's why my number one resolution for 2009 is to get running -- faster, longer, farther, better. Is a marathon in my future? I think not. Half-marathon may even be a stretch. But 10k? A definite possibility.

Now I'm accountable, and do not be mistaken -- I will report. I will work harder because I know someone (hopefully?) is watching.

I will start as soon as I finish my brownie sundae.

And after we get home from DisneyWorld, of course, because I just can't give up that french toast loaf.

(Did I mention we're at Disney this week? Robbers, don't steal anything! And believe me, there will be one mother of a post as soon as I've recovered. I have made some life-altering observations about The Happiest Place on Earth. Well, maybe not life-altering, but it sure sounded good.)


  1. i absolutely believe that disney can be life altering. why not?

    I'm right there with ya sister... if you do a 10K, I promise I'll run it with you. :) I promise for real this time. As in, I WILL actually do it. :)

    Just had to add my word verification is logypoli. It's my new favorite nonword.

  2. Disney?? How's life there with 3 children??? Need a report on that ... for future reference so if we are ever brave enough to take our son - or kids if we ever have more - I can remember your DOs and DONTs at Disney.

    Butty zoom ... not a worry for me, what I do hate is that roll that goes over the jeans line ... hate it with passion!! And it has nothing to do with how tight your jeans are, I can have baggy Jeans on and I can still feel and see that sucker! :( Hate it!!

    Congrats on the resolution of running a 10K - not there yet I just now started using the treadmill for 30 minutes so I'm far behind but may be one day I'll be there!

  3. I'd love to run a race with you and MommyJ. I was really into running races before I got pregnant last year. I even ran a half-marathon. But, I'm just getting back into it. I think I'm good for a 5k right now. But I'd love to work up to a 10k. My husband and I are running the Chamber Challenge in June. It is a 5k but it is a really tough one. We did it together the summer before last and it was literally the toughest 5k I've ever ran.

  4. I am with ya, girl! I am running a 10K in May- started "training" yesterday. I am too sore to run today- maybe later! It is frustrating because I was running races 2 summers ago, before I got pregnant and now I am starting from square one - all over again!! I am not a natural runner- it will always be work. Enough of that.. we can and WILL do it!!

  5. I don't know when I've laughed so hard as picturing your nightmare ... I believe I've had the same one! I am doing to train for a 10K this year, too!! I did my first triathlon last April and am hoping to do a 5K in the next 2 months and then work for the 10K. I will also do another tri in April again (or whenever they schedule the "annual" of the one I did last year)! Can't wait to hear of your Disney adventures ... I can only imagine what you'll have to say ;) We have vowed we won't make the WDW trip until Cougar is 5. We do Disneyland every year, though.

  6. Hey InkMom (I have to get used to identifying you by another name.)Thanks for the posts. I love em. And I want to know how to do a tally like you have for miles run. How did you create that?


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