Wednesday, January 7, 2009

I just can't stay away from the bathroom

When CPod and I were dating, he complained to me about the toilet paper stocked in the bathrooms at my parents' house. He called it John Wayne toilet paper -- it's rough, it's tough and it don't take crap from nobody.

Of course, because it was so hilarious, I immediately told my mom, who then used this little tidbit to maximum embarrassment capacity for my fair and delightsome (and thus prone to blushing) husband. She still gives him a hard time about it and we've been married nearly 12 years.

She has not, however, changed her toilet paper.

And neither have I. I would rather use plain old toilet paper that doesn't leave a little something behind, if you know what I mean, and since I'm the one buying it, CPod's stuck with John Wayne. Besides, when my kids decide to unwind the entire roll, they're only a quarter of the way through before I notice that things are too quiet and arrest them mid-crime. You can't say that about the soft stuff.

This week, we are in Florida with CPod's entire extended family. There are 15 of us all together, including 6 children aged 4 and under. Baby wipes have fallen into the "community property" category and I have discovered that they are not all created equal.

Give me rough and tough baby wipes that get the job done over those slimy, sensitive-skin wimpy ones that rip in half when faced with a really heinous crime against the schnoz.

Maybe John Wayne ain't so bad after all.


  1. Oh--not me! My parents used el cheapo tp too, and I hated it. We use nice tp in our house because we have a house full of sensitive bottoms. The really funny thing is that Russ used to give me a hard time when I'd complain about the tp at his parent's house. For the bathroom in their basement they had bargain basement tp--the thinnest one-ply stuff you've ever seen. Well in the last few years when we visit his parents he swipes the good stuff from upstairs--I've gotten him hooked on it!

  2. I should be clear . . . I don't buy the cheapest of the cheap! The TP I buy is actually a little on the expensive side, unless you compare square by square. Tough, yes. Cheap, no. Somewhere, there is a balance between soft and residue-y and rough and sandpaper-y!

  3. That was funny! Loved it! I hated the toilet paper at school. It was like wiping with typing paper. Ouch!

  4. Definitely need the proper toilet paper and wipes.
    Just don't put a wipe down the toilet- it's expensive.


Sock it to me!